When I was younger, I told myself things like “ill never be fat! I’ll never gain weight! I’ll make sure of it!!!” Because I put too much value in the way I looked and thought fat was synonymous with negative things. I had a mother who obsessed about her weight and appearance. She would cry and agonize over aging. She was afraid of her body changing. Here I am, almost 30 and I look at myself in the mirror and notice subtle changes. My boobs aren’t as perky, my skin has started to get loose. And all I can think of is how am I going to earn enough money to fix myself... when really, I don’t need any fixing. There’s some days I look and see someone who’s enough but there are still too many days where I don’t think I am. It’s an improvement and for that, i am thankful.

#top9of2018 #emmelinethings