I’ve surrendered my body to this being growing inside of me

It’s strange. ⁣⁣

I already feel like I’ve surrendered my body to this being growing inside of me. ⁣⁣


The idea of motherhood is completely new and unreal. ⁣⁣

Me a mother? Ha!⁣⁣


The cliche, “I can barely take care of myself” is true but for me it’s more,⁣⁣

Do I have the ability to give up my selfishness for another being? Am I willing and able to give up my time, energy and my hard earned money?⁣⁣

Am I able to give up my goals and ambitions for a being that barely even exists?⁣⁣


I love my life the way it is. I love the time I have. The freedom to move and do anything I want. I can easily hop on a bus to the mountains or take the next flight to Asia. I could suddenly switch careers. ⁣⁣


Now, that doesn’t seem as easily possible. ⁣⁣


Even with all these anxieties, I realize that I truly do want to be a mother.⁣⁣


As I mentioned many times, I’ve always imagined my future with a child. A baby? Not exactly. Adopting was in my future plans but this happened out of nowhere. ⁣⁣


Who is actually ready to have kids?⁣⁣

The universe decided for us and the time is now. ⁣⁣


(I am 100% pro choice. This is a decision I made on my own.)⁣⁣


I looked at my life and thought⁣⁣

I love my life. ⁣⁣

I am with my bestfriend.⁣⁣

We’ve travelled and experienced life together for the past five years. ⁣⁣

We know what we love. ⁣⁣


This? It’s bonus. ⁣⁣

It’s a result of our love. ⁣⁣

& I cannot imagine our future anything but full of happiness, love and adventure like our past 5 years have been. ⁣⁣


I’m terrified but⁣⁣

I think we’ll be okay. ⁣⁣

Welcome home little one 🤍⁣